**A Golfer's Guide to Surviving Costa Ballena Ocean Golf Club** Let me tell you, folks, if golf is a good walk spoiled, then Costa Ballena Ocean Golf Club is where good walks go to get utterly ruined - in the best possible way, of course! Course Layout and Features The 27-hole course is as tricky as a magician with a deck of cards. It sweeps and loops like a rollercoaster designed by someone who clearly had a grudge against straight lines. The first thing you'll notice is that it's flatter than a pancake on a diet. But don't let that fool you - like a stealthy ninja, this course has some tricks up its sleeve. There are water hazards here that could double as swimming pools, and bunkers so big they could host a beach volleyball tournament. And the greens? Well, they're slicker than a politician in election season. One minute you think you've nailed the perfect putt, and the next, your ball is rolling away from the hole like it just saw a ghost. Facilities and Amenities The clubhouse is a sight to behold. It's more like a castle than a clubhouse, complete with turrets and a drawbridge. Okay, I'm exaggerating, but it wouldn't look out of place in a fairytale. Inside, it's as plush as a velvet golf glove, with all the amenities you'd expect from a top-tier club. The pro shop is stocked with more gear than a NASA space mission. If they don't have it, you probably don't need it. The restaurant serves up dishes so delicious, you'll be tempted to retire from golf and take up competitive eating instead. Recommendations and Tips Keep an eye out for the 5th hole on the Yellow Course. It's a sneaky little devil. It lures you in with its scenic views, then laughs maniacally as your ball goes on a sightseeing tour of its own. My advice? Pack a snorkel. You might need it to retrieve your ball from one of those water hazards. And the golfers here? They're as diverse as a box of crayons. You've got everyone from the Pros "I've been playing since the womb" to the weekend warriors whose main workout comes from lifting the beer after the game. Watching them can be as entertaining as playing the course itself! Overall Impressions Costa Ballena Ocean Golf Club is a bit like a mullet haircut - business at the front (the challenging course), party at the back (the top-notch facilities). My overall rating? A strong 4.7/5. It's a place where eagles dare, birdies chirp, and bogeys lurk in the shadows. So pack your clubs, your sense of humor, and come on down - the course is waiting to eat your balls! Remember, folks, golf is a game where the slowest people in the world are those directly in front of you, and the fastest people in the world are those directly behind you. Enjoy your game at Costa Ballena, and may your swings be mighty and your swear words creative!